Mom replies

The long awaited reply....


Anabel and your family,


Your Dad and I have been gone for the last few days, but I want you to
know
that I have been thinking about your E mail constantly it seems.  In
the
late evenings and early mornings, in the car, motor home and church.  I
find
that I don't know what the answers are.  They are so simple for you Anabel
You, from the very beginning have given us a fait accompli.  You
neither
wanted or needed our advice or council. Not when you had the abortion,
not
when you were being blackmailed, not when you and J were having
problems
and thinking of divorce, not about your bi-sexuality, not about your
new
family which encompasses your bi-sexuality very neatly.

Your last e-mail puts us firmly in our place.  We have no place. Any
place
we once had you have given to your new family. It's interesting to me
the
way you indicate birth and new family like the love we have always had
for
you has been completely negated by the "love" you have for the "new
family".
You can not imagine the hurt that your Dad and I felt with the complete
disregard you showed in regards to you or the kids care and support. 
I
guess that works two ways and that you are not interested in any care
or
decisions that might have to be made as Dad and I get older.

You have chosen a path that I can not follow and are taking your
children
with you.  You say that you love what they bring to their lives.  I
have to
pray that that is true. My faith and the faith of my mother is slow to
change but I do not believe that if I live forever that it will ever
condone
a tri-sexual relationship. I am also sure that you are right that other
cultures do. But does that justify what we do.  I live in this culture
and I
do my best to follow the "Golden Rule" and the Ten Commandments.  I
would be
a hypocrite of the first order to call myself a Christian and yet
accept
what I consider unchristian behavior.  As a parent we set the examples
for
our children in hopes that they will have a happy life.  In the name of
love
you are setting an example for your children that sow the seeds of
doubt on
what is accepted behavior in our society and will make them happy.

There are very few times that we get together anymore.  Easter, Father
and
Mothers days, 4th of July and Christmas.  Birthdays have been far and
few
between and our anniversary only on the special occasions. That¹s
perhaps
8-10 days out of 365.  All of the other days you have with your  new
family.
In my mind it would seem that isn't too much to ask of you. Perhaps
four to
six days out of a year.  It would be you being uncomfortable versus six
of
us being uncomfortable.

I would also like to add that perhaps you won't always have this
problem
with your "birth family".  Dad and I are not getting younger and after
we're
gone you won't need to justify your life style to us at all.

Dad and I have always loved you, and we have always  been proud of you.
This has been a heart wrenching experience for us.  We have honestly
tried
to understand what you are trying to say, but  to us it is beyond
understanding.  This is your choice, we think you are wrong.  This does
not
stop our love for you.


Mom and Dad