*FGO's
I was riding a wave of acceptance. I went through a phase of letting quite a few people in on the three way relationship I'm in. So many kind supportive words! The wave finally broke.
My family is getting together this Sunday to visit a couple of out of town relatives. It's been over six months since I let my parents in on my relationship with em and eduardo. I asked my Mom if I could invite em, eduardo and the kids. She said "That would be nice." So I'm feeling really good about the acceptance; lucky to have parents that love and support me etc... etc. My significant others made time for this on their calendar. I knew it would be a bit nerve-wracking bringing them for the first time but it seemed like a bridge that needed crossing.
Em wrote about our really great similar experience with eduardo's Dad and step- mom. Then her Mom's unsupportive reponse the same day. At least my family could tip the balance in our favor.
So 4 or 5 days after extending the invitation, my sister, the family care-giver, calls and says they've all been talking and decided that they are not comfortable having my people come to this gathering. I was very angry. I still am. Heated emails followed. I've gotten the message now that they were all hoping that this thing was temporary: that I'd come to my senses: that it would all blow over. The words "abnormal" and "wrong" and something similar to "immoral" were used. I guess it was time the umbilical cord was cut. The pride and joy of the family is now the bad seed. My younger sister is probably jumping for joy about this.
So I'm not going. Major family rift. Whatever!
I got a call from my Al-Anon sponsor today. Seems she can't continue to sponsor me because she doen't agree with this relationship I'm in either. As eduardo says, so much for Live and Let Live.
Fuck Her!
*Fucking Growth Opportunities
posted by anabel @ 4:59 PM
7 Comments:
Give them time Anabel, to absorb, to understand. Their love for you will clear their thoughts. And if it doesn't? Fuck em. I don't mean Fuck Em, (although by all means do! :))I mean Fuck Them, who
cares? I mean, I know waaaaay down deep you still care but you need to live YOUR life.
As a formerly favorited daughter turned black sheep, I can say "Baaaahhhh the grass is greener over here where I am estranged."
Your sponsor sounds a wee bit judgemental. Wow. Find a new one, a supportive one.
It will get better. Maybe not right away but it will. I'll be thinking of y'all.
OOps sorry for swearing on your comments. I hate it when I do that. I mean, swearing in my blog is one thing, swearing on someone else's blog makes me feel guilty. How co-dependent am I? Apparently much.
That sounds harsh hon. Chunks seems to have some sound advice.
Hi sweetie - please know that a lot of people do care for and accept you. Those who don't... well, it's still aggravating and hurtful but at the end of the day it's their problem. They're scared to open their minds. Some will come around, and the others, well who needs friends like them? Stuff like that really pisses me off.
I've always wondered why AA people need sponsors. I hate AA politics... but I won't get into that too much here.
Hugs, baby. I for one accept you just the way you are. Hell, who am I to talk? I'm pretty weird myself. Apparently I'm a possum magnet. haha! :p
What's a possum magnet?
Rox made me laugh. fuck em. My new motto.
I think that this I guess it was time the umbilical cord was cut. is the gift in the struggle. There are less asses to kiss now. Yay.
Hopefully the Al-anon person will figure out that it's her problem, not yours. As far as family, I wish I could be encouraging.
Tu-du-dum.
Maybe some of them will come around, given time. You've certainly upset their apple carts.
Keeping track of whose ass needs kissing is such a demanding task. Relinquishing it frees up enormous reserves of energy.
What's a possum magnet?
It seems I have quite an opossum infestation in my home and patio. So much so that people have started asking what's wrong with me! Ya gotta admit that's kind of weird. I think they're all gone now though... I hope.
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