The four of us again

I'm Grateful to have a good relationship with my ex-husband. He made the two hour trip to town to see our daughter in her dance receital. Actually he made a day out of it by going Christmas shopping and getting in nine holes of golf. Unfortunately, there was a communication problem and the dance program started at five o'clock, not seven like daughter thought. She was upset because she got there when her group was on stage already. Everyone else somehow knew the right time. It's hard to know what happened but it was confusing because there were two performances, two days in a row. Daughter couldn't go last night because she had a final test in her Japanese class. She said she specifically asked her teacher the time for THIS performance. I've met this teacher and she's a bit scattered so it's possible that she gave her bum info. But, as I pointed out to daughter, there have been times lately when I will tell her something and she'll answer OK then later say she never heard me tell her that so I think it's equally - if not more possible that she tuned out the teacher the way she tunes me out sometimes. This time there was a bigger consequence - you know, a learning experience. But I digress.

We all went out to a coffee shop for some desert. Bill did a great job of talking to daughter who felt bad having her Dad make the trip for a performance that was missed. This is the man I was married to for 21 years. He's a really decent guy. I wish only the best for him. We all talked and laughed together for about an hour. It felt so nice and comfortable for it to be just the four of us again.

I told him in the parking lot that I enjoyed us all going out. He smiled and said he liked it too. While the kids were moving their stuff from my car to his truck, he and I continued talking. He's stopped drinking again and feels pretty good. He then told me he misses me and that he knows he wasn't always the best husband. He said he wasn't trying to change anything but just wanted me to know.

I thought to say it wouldn't have mattered because I'm gay but, you know, some things at some moments are better left unsaid. I'm glad he's taking better care of himself and hope the sobriety lasts. It would be great if he went to AA but he's always resisted that and it's his business. Still the evening that started off somewhat drama-filled turned out quite nice.