Hyper Responsible

Here is the thing I have been stuggling with of late. The feeling like I'm responsible for too many things in my life and in some cases in other peoples lives.

I realize it's rooted in my self esteem. I knew people would like me if I brought some value into their lives. With my parents it was pride. I was the good kid and it gave me a boost to be the succesfull one; good grades, graduating colledge, sports etc. It was odd to think that someone could like or love me for who I am and not feel the need to be some kind of asset.

In my business I try to do everything. What I need to do is delegate some of the responsibiliy to others and focus on the parts I like the best. I have every intention of doing this then fall into the "I'm the only one who can do this right" mentality.

This is affecting both my personal and business life. I was really upset about this the other morning so it's definitely something I need to work on. It seems big, like I'm having to let go of my security blanket.

I started my moon time the next day, so at least I know patially where the emotional outburst came from. Now I'm feeling less pushed about and can get some clarity on this. I'm learning so much about myself every day. It's a bit unnerving meeting new parts of me that have been hiding under layers of crap.